The Keeper

There was a time in my life when I worked very hard to not become “the soccer guy.”

In college, I was known as the goalkeeper. The keeper. The athlete. The one people remembered for diving saves and muddy uniforms and showing up on weekends carrying the strange loneliness that comes with standing in a net while everyone watches your mistakes in high definition.

I was good at it. Really good.

And I hated how much identity came with that.

Not because I hated the game, but because I wanted more from life than being reduced to one thing. There were other parts of me I was trying to protect:
the writer, the thinker, the builder, the artist, the curious kid staring at music equipment he couldn’t afford, the future father I didn’t even know existed yet.

So over time, I quietly pushed soccer away.

Not dramatically.
Not bitterly.
Just carefully.

Enough distance to make sure it didn’t swallow me whole again.

And for years, that worked.

Then my daughters started playing.